Forgive or Forget?
by Debbo Kakashi Hatake
Summary: Neji thought his love life was over when Itachi cheated on him with Sasuke. Things began to change when Shikamaru spends sometime watching clouds go by with him… until Itachi came back. Who will he choose? Will he forgive or forget? ShikaNeji; ItaNeji.
1. The Trouble With Neji

Yo! This is my first attempt at Angst stories! Hope you like it! Debbo Kakashi Hatake wants to put a disclaimer for this:

**I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. I only own my angsty plot XD**

This fic is totally random. I just thought of it while doing my homework XP ENJOY!

* * *

"I will never forgive you! Never, you hear me? Never!"

"But Neji! I know this is my entire fault. Can you give me another chance?"

"Shut up! I don't want to hear it anymore, Uchiha Itachi. I don't want to and never will!"

Neji stormed out of Itachi's bedroom with tears streaming down his face. Why did he have to do this to me? This unbearable feeling… Why must I be the one who has that?! Why?!

Neji's mind was in a whirl. Itachi just cheated him with Sasuke. He never thought the Uchiha would do that. But, on the other hand, maybe he did. Itachi changed a lot during the period of two years since they got engaged. Nothing seemed to be right.

Itachi tried to call out to Hyuuga, but failed miserably. Neji just ran and ran, as fast as he could. He never wanted to see that asshole again. Forever and ever.

0oo0oo0

It has been 6 months since the incident. Neji's mindset about relationships has been getting from bad to worse. He even swore never to get into another relationship.

Shikamaru walked casually to Neji's side, "Hey, what's up?"

"What is it that you want?" Neji coldly replied. That idiot was so irritating sometimes.

"Nothing. Just chilling."

Shikamaru laid his back on the grass and stretched. The Sun was about to set and the sky was a slight pink. Neji felt a tear drop on his lap. Itachi used to watch sunsets with him like this.

"Hey," Shikamaru patted the land of grass beside him as if a signal for Hyuuga to lie down beside him. Neji at first refused but he relented after a while. After all, he was tired.

"So, how's life?"

"Miserable." Neji turned to Nara, "What about you?"

"Troublesome, especially when your mom is asking you to get yourself a boyfriend. Actually, I swear she was demanding me to get one."

Hyuuga chuckled. Shikamaru was pleasantly surprised. It has been a long time since he even smiled, not to mention chuckle. Yes, that incident made him so depressed; he had to be admitted to a mental hospital for a while.

"I wish I had a mother... Or a boy…" Neji's voice trailed off when he said 'boyfriend'. He couldn't bring himself to say it. His heart still ached terribly; he just couldn't shake it off like that.

The long-haired boy nearly gasped as he felt a soft hand land on his. He turned to look down, to only find his friend caressing it so gently, as if it was the most precious thing on Earth.

Neji glared at him. Why must he do it? He remembered the time when Uchiha used to do the exact same thing like that. It was like that one last night before the engagement, when everything changed.

"What is it? Get. Your. Hand. Off. Me." That was when both of their eyes met. Neji thought it was the most beautiful hazel eyes he had seen. Wait, no it isn't! Rubbish.

Shikamaru then placed his soft lips on his. Well, almost.

Neji slapped Shikamaru on his left cheek. He shook his head. He wasn't ready for this. No, he wasn't at all.

"Shikamaru, I said hands off me." Neji gave him his same old cold, hard stare.

"Please Neji. You've been in this phrase for such a long time now. Why can't you accept me?"

"That's because it's too sudden!" He carried on, "You never dropped me any signs, any warning. Nothing. I can never take another relationship seriously, Nara. Not after what happened."

Neji rushed into the night, leaving Shikamaru totally clueless about what to do next.

* * *

There you go! I hope you liked it so far XD For those who are reading my SasuNaru fic, FYI, It's still ongoing and I'll do my best to finish it with a BLAST! XD Please push the tiny purple review button. It will be really appreciated! XD


	2. A Destined Change

Yo! Thank you for those who reviewed the previous chapter! XD And yes, Neji is a drama queen in this fic :D Please enjoy this chapter! XD I had numerous inspirations and Asphodel and Winter were the two who helped me out the most. Arigato! I also had a little inspiration from The Click Five's latest album, especially the song, "Empty". Heehee. Anyway, enjoy! XD

* * *

"Ah!" Neji woke up from his sleep. His palms were filled with sweat and he broke out in cold perspiration which flowed down his forehead. He just had nightmare. A really bad nightmare.

He took a quick glance at his clock. 5 o'clock. "Shit." He whispered as he rubbed his temples to reduce the headache. For goodness' sake Neji, why the heck did you wake up for that guy? He shook his head. His mind was still unclear. The dreaded memory of Itachi on his bed with...with…

A teardrop trickled down his cheek. His life was all in a mess. His boyfriend cheated on him, and to top it off, his best friend was the other party.

Uchiha Sasuke.

Cheated on him,

As a best friend.

The first time he saw Sasuke was the first day at the Academy. He was a smooth talker, slick and girls admired him. Neji used to joke, laugh and talk with him. He treated him with so much respect. It just hurts so much at the heart to find out about what he did. After all, the truth hurts.

Neji realized, from that incident, how the world actually is. Cruel, harsh, evil and nobody is trustworthy enough for his love. Nobody at all. He clutched onto his pants and wiped the tear away. He didn't know it would hurt so much just to lose that one person. The last time he was that emotional was when he found out his father had died. Empty was the only word which could describe Neji's heart right now.

He looked at the photograph in which both of them were in and there, signed at the side, was a little heart with Itachi's signature and a message which made Neji tear even more:

_I love you for always. I hope we'll be together forever and always. Just remember- __**I Love You.**_

He regained his composure.

He then decided. Hyuuga Neji was never to be trifled with. He shall stand tall. He shall make his life complete. He shall have friends. He shall live his life the way he planned to. He shall be Hyuuga Neji. He liked just being himself and what the hell was wrong with it?

Uchiha Itachi, just you wait. I will forget you. Because,

I can be strong.

I will be strong.

I **am** strong.

I **WILL** forget you.

0oo0oo0

Shikamaru walked through the streets of Konoha with thoughts of Neji racing through his mind.

Neji never knew, but Shikamaru witnessed the whole thing. He still remembered vividly how he saw the unbelievable scene of Neji crying. Truth be told, before that, he had never seen Neji cry. Not even once. Before he could stop himself, horrifying memories flooded his brain like no other…

**Flashback**

"I fucking hate you!" The boy just saw something nobody would want to see. He immediately flew into a rage, shouting vulgarities every now and then.

"Neji! What…" Itachi, on the other hand, was at a loss for words. Whatever he said to try to console him, his words felt like nothing to the Hyuuga.

Sasuke just stood up, his mouth agape, but no words could come out.

The older Uchiha grabbed Neji's hand and kept apologizing to him. "I love you! Don't go! Please!"

"Love me? I know what you gave me since our engagement- False hopes! Empty promises! That's what you gave me Itachi. That's what you gave me!"

"What happened with Sasuke and me… It isn't what you think it is!"

That only made Neji's blood boil even more.

"I don't give a shit about your affairs! Uchiha, you spoilt a perfect relationship. We are through!"

Before the boy could turn to leave, the shinobi pulled him in and planted a passionate kiss on his lips. Neji, with all his might, pushed him to the ground and ran off, sobbing really hard on the way.

**End of flashback**

Shikamaru sighed. Neji was scarred for life. He remembered how both of them were so carefree by each other's side. Nobody would have thought Itachi had the guts to betray him.

_How could you say that of Uchiha huh? You were just as useless at that incident. You were there, but what did you do to help Neji? Did you punch him? No. Did you even lay a finger on Itachi? No. What the fuck did you do, Nara? Nothing. Nothing at all. You just let Neji suffer in silence. You freaking let somebody you love suffer in silence! You have no right to judge others. So shut the hell up._

Shika had a crush on Neji from the first time he laid eyes on him, but never managed to win his heart. He always came in second to Itachi and he only became his best friend. When you fall in love sometimes… Just face it- love is a messy thing.

"Hey," Neji's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Neji?" Shikamaru, as shocked as he was, greeted the ninja.

"Want to go watch the clouds?"

Shikamaru blinked. Was he hearing correctly? He couldn't believe what he had just heard.

Neji grabbed his arm and dragged the cloud watcher to his favourite spot to watch clouds.

After a few minutes of silence, it was broken, "If I had known this would be so fun, I would have dragged you here everyday." Neji was amazed. He wanted to be like them floating freely in the sky.

"It's not that I didn't want to get you here! I tried so many times; I think I almost died of dehydration! All you did was gorge yourself! I even created an equation- eat more **plus** drink less **plus** die of dehydration **equals to** Neji."

Neji smirked. He loved to get Shikamaru all worked up. In fact, he loved to get everyone and anyone worked up. He was a natural sadist.

"Anyway…" Neji smiled at the lazy nin, "Shall we meet here everyday at five? The sun would be setting and the clouds would be a terrific sight to look at."

Shikamaru's eyes widened. What was happening to Neji?

He lightly touched his forehead.

"But you don't have a fever…"

Neji playfully slapped his hand, "Not funny, Nara."

The boy grinned and lay back to his original lying position.

"You're pretty troublesome, you know that?"

"You're pretty much like an old man, Nara."

Both of them grinned as they watched the sunset together.

* * *

There! I hoped you liked it! Go Drama Queen Neji! XD I would really appreciate if you would review! More reviews, the more the author is happy! XD Debbo-chan is now thinking of what to do for chapter three... :D


	3. Fated To Kiss

Yo! I had the urge to add in a chapter 3. Haha, It's not as angsty as the first chapter, I can assure you. Probably, the most angsty part is at the part where Itachi comes in. Yep! Traitor Itachi comes into the picture, at last! xD Hahaha. Hope you have fun with this chapter! Enjoy!

* * *

"This is the life!" Neji laughed as he stifled a yawn. It was way past midnight, so what was he doing here, way out here in the open? The answer was just beside the Hyuuga. "How troublesome, had I known you would be this annoying I wouldn't have introduced you to my beloved cloud-watching spot." Shikamaru groaned. Neji rolled his eyes, "Yeah right, Nara. Like you wouldn't," Shikamaru raised his eyebrow, "What makes you think otherwise?" Neji pondered over it for a while, "Because you're stupid?" Shikamaru sighed. Oh, he was in for a lot of hell.

0oo0oo0

"Fuck." Itachi felt the sharp metal blade cut through his pale skin as blood began dripping out of the wound. He has been out of sorts lately. He even thought of committing suicide one time. He sighed deeply. Why? Why did he cause such a misunderstanding? _That's because you're stupid enough to let your feelings get the better of you. _He hit the dining table with his wounded hand. For a normal person, it would have hurt so badly. But to Uchiha Itachi, he couldn't feel any pain at all. Why? The reason would have to lie with Hyuuga Neji.

That's all he had been thinking about these few months. He hated himself for the incident. Not only has he caused an even bigger gap between his partner, he also made Sasuke's and Neji's relationship sour- resulting in Sasuke not wanting to talk to him anymore. All he wanted was for Neji to like him even more as a boyfriend. Was that too much to ask? _I guess so, huh? _He felt a salty tear trickle down his seemingly emotionless face. After that, he couldn't bear to face the rest of Konoha. Because they all deemed him as a traitor of Neji's love. Who wouldn't?

The whole of Konoha can treat him as a trash for all he cares. But why Sasuke and Neji? Uchiha Sasuke and Hyuuga Neji are the only people he could actually share his feelings with, the only persons who could understand him enough. But even they were gone from his side. He now lived alone, not caring if any S-ranked criminal would come take his life- he would certainly welcome it alright. His life now needed to end… Needed to kill... Unless…

Unless _Uchiha Itachi returns to Konoha to tell the truth._

**(Meanwhile, somewhere in Konoha, Neji was having an awfully better time.)**

"Shikamaru…" Neji called out to the lazy ninja. "What? I'm in the bathroom." _Okay, meaning I'm safe from him for the time being. _Neji grinned. He pulled open his diary from his drawer and started penning down his thoughts. Then, he paused and turned back to his first diary entry after he was being admitted to the mental ward.

_Dear Diary,_

_I…I still can't get over what he has done to me. He has hurt everything. But the worst was the trust I had in him. That lowlife! How could a bitch like him make my heart ache so much? I will never trust him again. Nobody is good for my love anymore. You hear me? NOBODY!_

_Dated: 6 June 2008_

Neji smiled at the post. He turned to a fresh new page. He contemplated for a while, but decided to do it. There, in that tiny little page, wrote a paragraph.

_Dear Diary,_

_Remember when I said I will never love anyone again? And that no one is good enough for me? Well… I hate to break my own words but… I feel somebody is good enough for me after all. He's kind, sincere and… (laughs) lazy. He knows how to make someone as whiny as me better, he knows where it hurts and he knows how to mend my broken heart. I know it's too late to say if he'll stay true to me,_

The Hyuuga paused there for a while. Well, he can't say he was over Itachi completely. Those words 'stay true' still made him weep. But Neji decided he should be strong- and therefore continued.

_But I have this to say. This is the first time anybody has done so much for me. He even let me bunk into his house to ease the pain. All I have to say is…_

_Nara Shikamaru,_

_**Is worthy of my love.**_

_Dated: 5 September 2008_

Neji looked through his thoughts again and smiled a genuine one. _Maybe I could become an author sometime. _He chuckled as he put the tiny book back in his drawer. As he had nothing to do, he walked around Shikamaru's house, looking for something interesting to catch his eye. He took a quick glance at the lazy ninja's bookshelf. "Wow, he actually reads intellectual stories…" He muttered under his breath as he removed a book from the shelf. As he did that, another book came tumbling down. Neji picked it up to find the words 'Shikamaru's Diary' staring straight at him.

_Trust him to put something as precious as a diary somewhere safe. _He grinned. He might as well open it. He took a seat down and found himself completely glued to the diary. _He actually thinks and bothers writing it down… _He thought as he flipped through the mostly torn and tattered pages. Something then made him stop. It was a very recent diary entry, dated just last week.

_Sigh, I still remember the incident. Neji was being hurt so badly. But what did I do? Did you give that bastard a piece of his mind? No. Did you help Neji after you saw what happened? NO! What DID you do? NOTHING! You just let someone you love suffer in silence! I'm such an idiot. If only I had confessed earlier than Itachi… Maybe none of this would have happened…_

Neji gasped. He actually was there? Usually, he would have killed him if he ever knew he let him suffer there. But something in the last line told him not to. "Confessed earlier than Itachi? W-what did he mean?" Neji actually knew what it meant. He had loved Neji as long as Itachi- or maybe even longer. "So, he actually kept it a secret for so long…?" He clutched the book closer to his heart. He was actually being loved by someone after all?

Suddenly, the door opened. Neji quickly scrambled for the shelf and put it back. Shikamaru emerged into the room, "Hey, you hungry? I could go down the road to get you something to eat." Neji swiftly nodded as he tried to hide his blush. Shikamaru looked a little suspicious as he moved in closer to the older Hyuuga, "What's with your face? It's all red!" Neji touched his face, "No, it isn't. Oh, I read your diary." Shikamaru suddenly froze. "You…You read my diary?" Neji nodded innocently, actually waiting for the Nara to confess. Ha ha, perfect way to let him say he loved him without him making the first move. Smart Neji.

Shikamaru took a deep breath and said all he could in one breath,

"IloveyouIknowIshouldhaveconfessedearlierbutpleasebelievemeIhadmyreasons!"

Neji laughed. "You mean 'I love you, I know I should have confessed earlier but please believe me, I had my reasons'?" Shikamaru nodded his head vigorously. Neji smiled. Lazy as he was, he also was kind of cute. Without any warning, Shikamaru leaned over and gave Neji a kiss on his lips. "I… Love… You…" He said in between big gulps for air. Hyuuga's pale lavender eyes had a feeling of pure happiness as they walked out of the house to the ramen shop, hand in hand.

* * *

Heehee, here you go! xD Hope you like this story of mine xD I tried not to make Neji that OOC. Because I want to make the contrast from an angsty Neji to a happy Neji. Haha, will try to update soon xD In the meantime, please review! :D


End file.
